So long and thank you for all the tennis

November 11th, 2009 • 1 comment delpo, gillou, spice girls, the russian sexgod, tommy robredo

I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t heartbroken.

This past season and half, I’ve hardly been a Marat fan. I did try but it would normally end in heartbreak. At most times, Marat would lose without even trying. Since he announced his retirement, he played all matches this year like he couldn’t actually give a fuck if he won or not. In press conferences, he would whine like a big baby and talk about how boring it was to be a tennis player. I certainly wasn’t going to be the one that cared.

His tournament in Paris was his last. This is the most special Masters (or ATP 1000, whatever) for Marat. He won three times there. In Paris, with his last strokes as professional tennis player, he cared. In the first round, he saved match points and clutched a tight victory. Today, he fought hard again. He wanted to win. He saved break points in the second to take the match to a final set. He managed to save match points but, this time, it only made the result be postponed for a bit. He lost to Delpo but he sure as hell went down fighting.

I don’t believe even the most delusional fan had hopes to see him take the title. I think it was a quite proud defeat. It wasn’t embarrassing as I had expected.

After the match, there was a ceremony on court. Marat got an award. A bunch of players (pictured above) went to honor him. A video of his best moments on tour was showed on the big screen. It was pretty sweet. You could see he was getting emotional but Marat is too much of a SexGod to tear up.

Marat was easily my favourite ATP player when growing up. I was 10 when he won the U.S. Open and I had the biggest crush on him. At 14, when he won the Australian Open, I still intended on marrying him. We’d live in a house in Moscow, mock The Da Vinci Code and watch David Lynch films in bed. It was a mighty life plan, let me add that.

I hope he now does whatever pleases him the most. Which I’m sure will involve wooing attractive blonde girls like he so loves. He can run for president, form a boyband, cure cancer, conquer the world. Oh, Marat, I’ll still marry you if you so insist.

I’ll leave you guys with a bit of vintage!Marat. Here’s the Russian in the Late Show With David Letterman in 2000. This was after he won over Sampras his first Slam. You can tell he was a rockstar even then.

Farewell, babe. ♥

"Gay as a tennis player" is a recurring joke, I'm telling ya

July 9th, 2009 • 1 comment caro the danish cutie, gael monfils, gillou, gise dulko, kiri is 2 hot 4 u, sorana banana

I swear to goodness, tennis must be the only thing on earth that makes me run out on jokes. I seriously can not come up with anything wittier than “OH LOL YOU HOMOS” after looking at those pictures. I’ll leave the funny to movies then, eh? And isn’t tennis + fashion + pop culture a cool mix? I BELIEVE SO, yes.

Ok, this has absolutely nothing to do with the post (unless you want to make a gay joke regarding how Caro sits and the fact she really likes ABBA) but…

This picture? That’s a freakin’ creepy smile going on there. I can almost see her going in her head “MWAHAHAHA *evil laugh*”. Geez. I bet she’s coming up with an evil plan how she’s going to moonball Kiri to death tomorrow. Also, glittery purple nail polish? What is she? A Scandinavian drag queen? For fuck’s sake, Caro. You’re lucky I love you sometimes. Or not — depends how you look at it, actually.